Hi.
I’m the new Content Strategist that Brice mentioned in the previous post. I don’t know about you, but I definitely wanted to read other applicants’ writing portfolios (I didn’t, don’t worry!) after reading Brice’s post. I’m still in disbelief over how I got here, but allow me to externally process it with you.
I’ve always been an external processor, and writing is one of the ways I express myself. For context, I don’t have a degree or background in writing, but writing has always been a part of my life. If you were to visit my old room at my parents’ house, I have countless journals stored inside a plastic drawer that contains my writings all the way from elementary school. These journals contain everything from secrets that I had never uttered to a soul to prayers that I had written when I couldn’t audibly articulate my thoughts. Writing was a way of escape that allowed me to freely express myself. Growing up, I knew I shouldn’t say everything I was thinking and feeling, especially when I’m mad, because I could easily spew out words that could hurt the other person (e.g., my older brother). Instead of screaming into my pillow every time I was angry, which definitely has happened, I would write down how I felt so that my anger wasn’t bottled up, like a radioactive bomb that could tick off at any moment. Rather, writing out my emotions helped me to grow in self-awareness, or at least, that’s what I’d like to believe.
Despite writing being a regular practice for me, I’d honestly never considered myself a writer until freelancing with Amenable in February 2023 while finishing up my masters degree in biblical counseling. I still remember thinking, “I get to be paid to write? SWEET!” I have a complicated relationship with writing as I’ve never felt confident about it, but it’s through the team at Amenable who encouraged me to keep going. Even though I’m still not as confident as I’d like to be with my writing, I’m grateful to continue growing as I write. When you write for yourself, you don’t mind if a thought is left unfinished, because who will read it anyways? But as I started writing for an audience, it challenged me to finish my thoughts, as well as be more intentional about what I’m trying to communicate, rather than leaving an unfinished entry safely tucked away in my journal.
While it still feels a bit awkward to say that I write, it’s what I do. Just like brushing my teeth twice a day to meditating on Scripture by writing in my ESV Illuminated Scripture journal, it’s part of my daily routine. I still journal a little bit before I head to bed each night, and I’m enjoying how my relationship with writing continues to shift and evolve. My audience of none has now changed to actually having an audience (thank you for reading), which terrifies me at times.
Writing, to me, is risky business. You express yourself with words, written down for an audience to read and critique. You have absolutely zero control over how they may perceive your writing or you, for that matter. Was my message clear? Would they understand what I’m trying to say? Endless questions can come and go as you send off your writing. It will never be perfect, and that’s what gives me peace as I hit submit. It’s a good thing that I’m not risk-averse. I won’t lie that there’s an odd thrill that comes from not knowing how my writing will be received. Will I be asked to rewrite the whole thing? What was the topic again? I’m not kidding when I say that questions circle in my mind, but I also feel an inexpressible peace once I submit my work.
It’s left my hands, and I now await feedback. I don’t know about you, but I love receiving feedback. It’s the only way that I can continue to grow and improve. Whether it’s received well or not, as long as I receive constructive feedback that helps me to become a better writer, I welcome it all. It keeps me humble. I don’t know if I’ll ever feel the confidence that I wish to have, but the fact that there’s always an area that I can work on helps me to press forward. How can I express an idea to an audience with more grace? What’s the best way of articulating this idea and doing it with kindness and joy? How can I encourage someone through my writing?
I’m not saying that I have things all figured out. After all, I’m still learning and growing, and that certainly applies to my writing. I like to ask for feedback or input as having fresh eyes is always helpful. In writing, I hope to grow more compassionate and humble. It’s not just about what I say, but how I say it. It’s also helpful that being a biblical counselor hones me to be more intentional and empathetic, and I hope that my writing reflects the heart of the One that I long to emulate. I want to have a wider view of the horizon that enables me to push forward in the way I challenge myself and those around me through writing.
Through the process of brainstorming, outlining, writing, and editing, writing has helped me to reflect on what exactly it is that I’m trying to communicate. At times, I’m not so sure myself, so brainstorming may take longer than I’d anticipated. But even that is a process. Whenever I feel stuck, I enjoy taking breaks by going for a quick walk or eating my favorite snack (Hot Cheetos, anyone?). I love that writing is this continual process that has intentional steps to produce an outcome of communication that fosters connection. Isn’t that what we all want? To be seen, heard, and known–what a joy it is to continue on in this process, one word at a time.
